Not always friends.

  Honestly I would be lying if I said that me and Udex had a perfectly happy relationship all the time.. Because we don't. Some days it goes so great I can hop on him tackless and ride.. and others? Well Udex and I don't seem to be friends on those days. I usually choose to right only about the good things and times I have with him, but as with all horses with bad past experiences, there are just as much bad moments as good. In about a two month time span we go through a few days, to even two weeks where we just don't get along.. at all. Of course we both still love each other, but our connection with each other just isn't as strong as it should be.
  It's been about a week where Udex and I haven't been best friends now. Yesterday he crossed the line, although I'm not innocent either. I should start from the beginning before I get too jumbled up in words!
 Yesterday I rode Udex. He was okay, but not as okay as I would have liked him to be. Lately he has been fighting against the bit big time, running like a lama under saddle, and refusing canter. I think I'm going to pick the crop, if that fails then spurs, back up and try them again before I officially decide he is being a bit stubborn. Usually when you ride with a crop he gets his head in with you and knows that your not playing around and what you are asking for is real. Okay- to get back on track here! After our ride I put Udex's sweat blanket on, cooled him off for a bit then took him back outside to groom him and put his winter rug on. He was okay during grooming, not too much pacing. When I put blankets on Udex, or anything by has back end, he gets a little sensitive by the skin by his back legs. The part by the hip and back legs? The name for it escapes me at the moment. Usually he picks his leg up like he is going to kick be he never does it. Some days he may kick out an eency bit but he is so kind hearted he never actually hits anyone. Yesterday he proved me wrong. I was going to strap the parts on his blanket by his legs and he picked his leg up a bit. I took a little step back and was going to give him a second to put it down. Like predicted, he did. So I went back over to strap it again. He was quiet one second and the next... BOOM! Ouchhh!!! He got me right in the leg above the knee. I have been kicked numerous times by horses.. Just never from such a big, tall, powerful one.
 I don't know what hurt worse.. The pain from the kick, or the pain in my heart from feeling so lost with my horse at this time. Right now I just feel so defeated against him. It feels as if he doesn't love me and I do so much hard work and make so many sacrifices for him, and he in return offers nothing. I know that isn't true, it's just that it sure doesn't feel that way right now. I hope we come out of this stubborn, gloomy time frame soon. I can't stand it! I have no drive at all to do anything with him right now. Something as simple as grooming him takes all my energy away and usually ends up with me sustaining a large amount of bruises, and him getting a not too happy vibe from me.
 On the bright side however I will be buying several new items for him. I am picking up on friday my nice new gel wedge for underneath the saddle. It offers great support for a weak back, protects the back muscles, makes the saddle fit like it should, forms to his shape, and should make him a bit more relaxed. As for me, I hope Udex does feel better from the new pad!! Saturday, maybe even Friday I am looking so forward to giving it a try!! Also, I think I will be supplying Udex with new vitamins. His newfound attitude could be from lack of minerals! I took him off his feed, and starting tomorrow I'm giving it back to him, PLUS more mineral bricks. He will be getting his usual power feed with oil (slowly weaning him back on the oil again.) Am I crazy for giving me already hot horse power feed? That very well could be the case. It's a crazy chance I'm going to take. With his power feed mix he will get the right amount of nutrients, and that could change a bit of his attitude. Besides, I can ride a hot horse, no problem.. It's only the bridling of Udex that gets me!!!! Hee-hee.
 Tomorrow I'm going to try to be strong and do my best to handle the mighty Udex right and not let him get the best of me again!!! I love him so much, and I don't like the feel that neither of us is offering our best. So I'm going to change that tomorrow.. <3

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

There's only three things...

 There is only three [discovered] things that seem to scare Udex. They are.

1. Flying balls
2. Clear bags and bottles
3. Tractors

 I find it normal flying balls scare him. I'm a human and scared of them, I can only imagine how a horse must feel about them. No arms to throw in front of their faces! Clear bags and bottles? Well thats a little interesting, but I can understand that too. Stuff that you can see inside something, the way the light reflects.. Understandable. Tractors... Seriously, little green tractors!?! No, I can not find any logical reason as to why tractors scare him. You can start a motorcycle off right in front of his face, you can halt him right by a car and talk to the driver... but tractors a good 50 feet away from him? Now thats a total different story. Udex confuses me greatly.
  I was looking for a spot to tie him up today and about 45 feet away there was a tractor. Of course, it wasn't really a tractor. It was actually a huge horse hungry monster that was headed STRAIGHT towards Udex!! In "how to be a horse school," when something that scary is on the run towards you, you are supposed to take off, totally trampling over your owner who is leading you. Thats exactly what Udex did. All I can say is OWIE!! That hurt! I do feel a bit accomplished that I didn't let 750 kilos of wild, spookish beast get out of my grip. I held on tight to him even as his crow hopping lifted me in the air as well. I didn't know if I should be more mad at the tractors, or my horse, or myself!! Lately Udex has been frustrating me on all ends. If it isn't this, it's that. If it isn't that, then it's this. He's been a nut ball lately! At least today I managed to put his bridle on outside, and not having him in the arena or stall. That was really nerve wrecking for me because I knew that if he managed to run away.. he would be gone. There is no fences in that part of the barn, he could have gone straight down the hill and far, far away. I get nervous just thinking about that!!! I hope he starts to be a bit more submissive during tack up time!!!
  I rode Udex today. No head throwing at all!!! I think thats because he isn't bored. He has so much to do here now. Thats really awesome he has been feeling so great to the point he's almost too hot to handle!! (-: He needs this!!!!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Bruises and blood.

  Putting the bridle on a horse isn't usually hard... Key word: Usually. As always, the term usually doesn't ever apply to my crazy horse. It took about an hour just to bridle him. An entire hour. Oh man. Some days my horse drives me bonkers!! I had him in his stall so he couldn't run away and he was just too mentally excited. Kicking, running around in circles in his stall, nipping. You name it. Since we have changed barns he hasn't been nervous alone at all, so I know that wasn't the case. Anyway Udex was crazy. Every time I would get the bit in his mouth, he would raise his head up as high as it could go, (easily over six something feet.) Considering the fact I am only 5'1... Yeah, didn't really work too well. During our little "discussion" about bridling, Udex gave me over ten huge bruises, a bloody lip, and stepped on my feet over four times. Not too surprising considering the mood he was in. Obviously after about fourty five minutes of struggling I realized no good was going to come from fighting in his stall. I let him run in the arena a few minutes before I tried again. He was still extremely difficult to bridle but I managed to do it.
  Then I was able to ride. (-: He was hot to the touch while riding. I love it! He has always been a hot horse, but here at our new barn... He's not only physically hot he is also mentally hot as well. I guess thats what the difference is! I'm really happy I have this new hot-in-every-way kind of horse!! He's been a real joy to work with.. Even if he has an off day like today!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."