SUNNNNN!!!!

Our new spring Colors!

  Ooooh! It's been so warm and sunny!!!! Germany has really been sneaky about this weather! One day it's cold and bitter, and literally the next day is bright and way warm!! Udex has really been enjoying being outside with all the others. It's great seeing him playing and prancing around. Also- all the walking has been so great for his leg. It isn't really swollen anymore. It actually looks somewhat normal which is a huge relief. He's able to move so freely on it.
  The movers packed all my tack. Everything is on the way to America now- it's crazy. The only things that are with me right now for Udex is a curry comb, a brush, a hoof pick, a sweat blanket, a paddock blanket, a heavier winter blanket, three halters, and three lead ropes, supplements and his feed. OH, and a huge bucket of treats... Haha. It's so odd not having all my things with me. Oh well! Even if it's just a few things it's all that I really need for now!!

  I've added a bunch of recent pictures of Udex, being Udex. (: Enjoy!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success." 

One Year.

   February 12th, 2011.   At 5 A.m. my family and I woke up. We all piled into the car to begin our 5 hour trip from our small town in Germany, to an even smaller town in The Netherlands to meet an orange horse named Udex. We were all very excited that after searching in every country in Europe for horses, this one, Udex, seemed to be everything we wanted. The entire trip to The Netherlands we were wide awake with suspense and nerves!
  As soon as we pulled up to the small shelter I was immediately nervous!! What if this horse and I didn't get along?? What if I couldn't ride him well... What if, what if, what if... We talked to the owner of the stable as she led us to the stalls! Down at the very end of the row was a big, shy, orange horse. He didn't stick his head out of his stall, he just stood in the corner looking awfully lonely. They took him out of his stall and instantly I realized that 1m74 was A LOT bigger then I had expected! He was huge! I made up my mind right then and there that I didn't want to ride that big horse!! -I was having very bad confidence issues and was very intimidated from his size.- One of the girls helping out at the stable took of his blanket. I was really shocked to see a lot of bones, and thick mangy fur. As soon as that blanket came off I felt clear as day that this horse needed help.. not just anyones help but my help. I felt an instant connection. I only saw him as a horse in need long enough to realize he needed my help.. but after those few minutes I saw him as the most beautiful creature to ever walk this planet. They walked him to the arena and let him run around. I didn't even notice his movement, I was just standing there star-struck at the beauty of this horse called Udex. Something about him.. He wasn't like the other horses I had looked at.. I felt connected with him.
  There was a very kind woman there who came to also buy a horse. She knew Udex from his past and was very surprised to see him there. Since I was a bit nervous to ride him, she rode him a bit first, just so I knew he would be safe. After a few minutes with her riding him, it was my turn!! It felt right sitting on his back. With each step in trot it felt so great. Although I was having very bad confidence issues I didn't feel deathly afraid of Udex. The whole time he was running with his head straight in the air, or like a lama.. but that didn't matter to me. Beneath the mangy fur, ewe neck, and bones there was something inside of this horse that I knew I couldn't be without.
  After riding Udex we agreed that this was the horse. I was fighting back tears. (Still am as I write this!) All my dreams were coming true! This beautiful horse was mine!!! I remember looking at him and whispering to him that I would make him feel better.. He let me hold his head in my arms as I said those words to him.
  After putting him back to his stall we went inside and signed the paper work!!!! Holding his papers/passport in my hands was the best feeling I'd ever felt. My horses passport. The feeling was too unreal.
    That was a year ago. In just two hours it will be February 12th. This year with Udex has been more amazing then I ever could have thought. He's improved so much- he isn't the same horse. He's gained over 80 kilos, a lot more muscle, no more ewe neck, no more sunken in depressed eyes, no more fear of bridle, but most importantly.. He's learned to be a horse and accept my love. It's been a rough, windy road with him but it's leading to the most perfect destination. Every bump in the road has just made us tougher. It's taken about a year but we have a really strong bond. I trust him with my entire life. I can run and he will gallop right by my side.
  I don't know where I would be without this horse. February 12th is the biggest holiday I will ever celebrate. I'm so thankful Udex is my horse.. Everyone thinks we found a broken down horse and fixed him.. but the truth is he fixed us, all of us. I couldn't have been more lucky... Happy One year anniversary to my beautiful Udex... and many more to come. xoxoxox :-* <3

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Wyoming, here we come!?

   It's official... Udex and I (and our family of course! are moving to Wyoming!! IN LESS THEN TWO MONTHS! Aaaah!! I'm a bit sad and excited at the same time! I will miss the people of Germany sooo much! Everyone I love is here! My trainers, my friends, horses.. That's the part that's shredding my heart. As for Germany itself?? I won't really miss it. The gloomy, rainy, dull climate? Buh-bye!
 Obviously this means Udex will be taking a plane ride! Wait... what? YES! Horses actually can go on planes! I'm kind of freaked out about that! I'm a bit nervous! Considering he get's a bit nervous when he's away from his herd, I'm curios to see how this is going to go about.. Also I heard that the biggest horses goes in the middle of the three stalls on the plane?? That means Udex will be in the middle between two others!? Uhh.. I don't think that would be a good idea. Maybe I will request they handle him as a stud?? In his head he seems to think that's what he is anyways.
 As for quarantine, that shouldn't be too bad! He's a gelding so that means less time in there as a mare or stallion would have [thank god!] I'm really, really, really worried about the whole not being able to go within so many feet of him. It's my baby.. in a new country?? It hurts a lot that I won't be able to go near him, but maybe I can manage a way to chuck a carrot to him some how.. tiihii. Oh well! I hope he is alright! He's pretty attached to me, and really nervous of people in general! I'm sure there will be many good people taking care of him though, so I can't feel too bad for myself and Udex.
  I do plan on filming/taking pictures of all this!! This is a huge part of our journey!! It will be amazing to fly into the big U S of A with my best friend right with me. This is basically a first for both of us. Although I was born in the USA I have lived here in Europe for over 12 years! I'm excited to start this big chapter of our story! I told Udex tonight about him coming to America! He didn't seem to mind that thought too much.. tiihii!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Updates??

  Wow! I've been so busy lately... I've neglected this blog! Aaaah! Every time I do so, something very interesting and blog worthy happens. Shame on me.
  Well to start this entry off.. Udex is still not rideable from all the kicking. His leg is no longer swollen, but all his muscles are extremely tense, painful, and stiff. I can't ride him until we have our amazing homeopathic healer, Utta Wagner, come out to do some more work on him. I hope after just a little while he'll be good as new! The good news to this though is that he no longer has to be trotted 10 minutes and walked 20. He is free to go as he will. Everyday I've been letting him play in the arena. He's really crazy with energy!! He's bucking, crow hopping, and even making a really, really, really "totilas big" extended trot at points!! It's really fun to see him this energetic!! He's also, (as of four days ago) back on his feed!!! I've also started adding two supplements to his meal.. Magnesium, and Amino Acids. Within two days of him being on those two supplements, I saw a huge difference. Not only in his mental status, but in his movement as well. If he wasn't already a flashy horse, now he practically shows off every step. He's starting to feel better and better everyday. Some times I can't believe I'm looking at my horse running around with his legs high up in the air. He's a horse that a few years ago, I could only dream of riding, yet alone owning. He's sure been a handful of work but I guess it's all worth it. Some days he's ticked me off to extremes, but even then we're still pretty good friends!!!
  I can't wait till he is better and to start lessons again!! It's been so long! I miss riding my pony!! )-: P.s. I will add pictures of this new found extremely flashy Udex!!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Swollen leg!?

  What a way to start the year. I don't even know how to begin this story. I guess it starts three days ago when Udex was avoiding having his back right hoof picked up. He would pace and pace and pace. When I finally would manage to pick up his hoof he would pick it up really high and kick out. Over the next few days it had just gotten worse; even to the point where he would downright refuse to lift it.

The white one is the swollen one.

The resting one is the infected hoof.

  Other then being weird during hoof time, Udex was displaying no other signs of pain, injury, lameness, or anything else abnormal... Until yesterday that is. I got to the stable in the evening and did the usual. Got all the supplies I would need for the evening (sweat blanket, grooming supplies, etc.) by his stall. I took him out and was about to do the hooves when I realized his back right leg was about 4x larger then the other one!!! Of course I was having a mini heart attack, thinking of the worse right away. "Uuuuudex!? What did you do to yourself this time!?" My friends had a look too and confirmed that I wasn't crazy, but yes indeed Udex's leg had turned into a balloon. When I touched it he picked his leg up as to kick. After a few minutes he calmed down and let me feel around on it. It didn't feel too warm, but it did feel squishy. I took him to the arena to see if he was limping any. Once again, no apparent signs of anything wrong! Not even a limp in walk or trot! While I was trotting him in-hand he actually took a canter step, threw his head, and bucked- a thing he only does when he's very fresh and happy!

holding him for the vet.

  I was stumped. Why did his leg look like it belonged to a draft horse instead of a sporthorse?? After I had walked him for about 30 minutes and saw no difference in the swelling my friends helped to do the best for Udex. We put cold water on his leg, but still no change. We also put a special cream on it, once again, no change. We called it a night and decided if it wasn't better tomorrow we would call the vet.

Holding him for the vet.

  Today was tomorrow. The leg was not any better. Still swollen. Udex still wasn't limping or displaying any signs of being uncomfortable. Needless to say, the vet got a call!! Those moments waiting for the vet to come out are always the worse. I don't know about you, but for me I always start to assume the worse.

I'm not the biggest fan of twitches but
he needs it!

  Anyways, our Vet came out as soon as possible!! The prognosis?? A wooden splinter in his leg that had gotten infected. How did he get the splinter?? Udex and the horse in the stall next to him are always fighting. The mare is very food focused and when she isn't eating 24/7 will bite/kick at Udex's stall. Him still being a stallion in the head fights back. He has some pretty powerful kicks, and when he kicks the wood it splinters off. Obviously finding a really tiny splinter through thick fur would be almost impossible. The wound had already healed, but the swelling was from an infection.
  Udex got two shots in the chest, and will take three doses of antibiotics for the next two days. On Thursday we will repeat this process again and see how he's doing. (Oh, the farrier also comes then!) For probably the rest of this week I will be hand walking him for about 15-20 minutes. Oh boy will he be fresh the day he can finally free run!
  Our vet was truly amazing! She was so calm with him and understanding. What makes her so great is that she's a horse girl. She thinks of the horse and how he's feeling before anything else. I was so impressed with the way she treated Udex!! Wow! Total respect! I know that no matter what the situation, with her as the vet it will be okay.
  Right when you think your horse is in a stall 24/7, no way can he get injured; you're wrong. Horses are really accident prone (especially mine!!) and they can really surprise you with what they can do to themselves. It's a good reminder for me that with a horse you can never be too sure. Like I said in the beginning.. What a way to start 2012! I sure hope it does get better!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Merry Christmas 2011

  I've been so busy!!! This is the one month that is constantly keeping me occupied!! Oh my.... First off, MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! I hope you all had a lovely time, wether you got snow, rain, sun or fog. (-:
  Udex and I have been doing so great!! It's been the same routine recently. Riding, playing, lunging, or another fun thing like that. Today I let Udex play and he was bucking and crow hopping! We caught one little session on camera!

 
  I got the most amazing gifts!! A very close friend, Heather, was so kind and bought me the item of my dreams.. A sony handycam!!! I've wanted one for almost a year now!!! She not only got me a handycam, but one of the nicest ones sony makes!!! It's amazing!! I'm so thankful for such great friends. Also two other families were so kinda as to give my family and I gifts. It amazes me how nice people can be, even with times being hard like now!
  I will write more later! As for now I'm super busy! Once again, hope everyone had a lovely time! Enjoy the video from Udex today! Hee-hee!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Lovely lesson with Lux Dressage!

  I've been so busy lately with giving lessons and riding! It's so nice to have nice fitting tack and to be able to ride my silly horse again.. Aaah! It's been a liiitle over a week since I've last posted.. and it's really crazy to think just how much has happened in that short period of time!!! First off, Udex has been gaining weight left and right! I swear, every time his blanket comes off he's bigger!!!!! He gets his beet pulp, corn oil, power pellets, and "complete" grain mix twice a day. It's been doing him wonders!!! I'm really happy to see him gaining weight finally! It took forever to find the right, nutritious, tasty, proportional combination for him but we've done it! Anyway, there were a few major things these past nine things that are worth writing about. I'll make a paragraph and maybe a picture or so with each.
  I planned on clipping Udex this year, like always. He's a sport horse that works his muscles to the max with every ride, lunge, free run, arena session... you name it! How fair is it to let him get really sweaty and chilled?? It's not. So that's why we clip horses (well, at least for me.) Half way through a somewhat high-trace style clip, my clippers died. Udex looked like a mauled horse. Chunks of fur clipped here and there, and other places still coated. Ah!!! What could I do though? Nothing. So poor Udex had to look a little ridiculous for a while!!!
  Verena Heinz from Lux Dressage is my new trainer!! I'm so, so, SO excited about this!! Yesterday I had my first lesson with her! She also finished my clip on Udex! She did such a great full clip on him! She left his face and hind legs on. It took almost two hours, yet she was so patient and calm with him!! I'm so thankful she was kind enough to finish the job.. She also managed to fix my clippers as well!! The lesson with her was great!! She has to be one of the best riders I've ever seen. I think everyone knows how still and quiet Edward Gal can sit a horse... I thought it impossible to sit a horse more still. Then I watched videos of Verena and was proved wrong! She sat the horses from the videos I'd seen so beautiful. Not moving at all!! I was really eager to see how her seat would be with bumpy rocking horse Udex!! WOW!!!!! Beautiful!! Not moving at all while Udex cantered and trotted! It was magnificent looking!! My camera died. ): I wanted very badly to take videos! I'd never seen a more elegant rider before!
  Besides having such a graceful seat and being a talented dressage rider, Verena is an extremely kind horse woman; which to me is important. She said riding Udex she could tell he has much fear of the reins and legs (from his rollkur past). She respected that. She didn't force him to do what he wasn't comfortable with. He was throwing his head (from fear) and going like a Lama, but she helped him to gain confidence, and every time he relaxed and went round, she would instantly praise him. By the end of her time riding him, you could see he felt better about going round, and was more calm and trusting. I think it was really good to see a professional rider ride him, and still see that he was afraid. It made me feel better knowing that it wasn't just me not being a good enough rider for him. Most the fear is made up in his head. The pain was once there; yes. However, it's gone now and I'm making sure it never comes back. He just needs to trust me 100% on that. It will take time to have him get used to this new way of life, but I think once he realizes everything is okay, he will be okay.
  It's very probable that I'll be moving Udex to Verenas barn to further progress in training for the both of us. We will be training daily there; which is what we both need if we want to have a future in this sport. I'm really excited about this!! Everything seems really clear when I think about joining their lovely facility! The opportunity to train with such elite riders is so tempting!! I also know that at her stable, there would be other Udex's. Horses that are dressage from tail to nose, flashy movements, similar personality, similar builds... I have a feeling Udex would be extremely happy there..
    I have high hopes for the future at this moment!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

 

Possibly going to America?

  It's been lovely riding with Udex! He's totally comfortable in his new saddle, which is refreshing. He doesn't throw his head at all! He does still go like a lama, but very rarely. I think the lama act is more so out of fear of pain. With every ride he's learning there is no pain so no need to go as lama. Every ride after a bit, he realizes that and stops being Lama-Boy. It's been all rain here in Germany, so unfortunately the horses are cooped up in their boxes. Udex has been hot to the touch- I like! The slightest leg movement and zooom! He's off! He's been giving this huge, floaty trot! That's not even his extension, just his regular working trot. I asked him for an extension and got this amazing result. It was so floaty I could actually sit it smoothly! I could feel the lift it had from the ground. HUGE! My friends eyes almost popped out of her head when she saw that big movement. Sometimes I frustrate myself because Udex is a grand prix horse, but I am no grand prix rider yet. I sometimes wonder that if someone more experienced had a seat on his back what amazing movements I would get from him! Oh well, just means I have to learn it faster!! (-:
 More news! We may be moving to The U S of A soon! Perhaps Wyoming?We're going to move back to the states sooner or later. It's really all just a matter of time. Anyways, there is a slight chance we may be moving before October! Exciting!! That means Mr. Udex would be taking a plane trip! I've read up about it and from what I've heard there is usually three stalls. The tallest horse in the middle and smaller ones to the side. My first thought was "Oh great. My 17.3 hand Udex who has horse-phobia in the middle of two strangers mid air! Aaaah!" Oh boy!! I'm getting excited thinking about this! I'm a bit bummed about the quarentine and not being able to see him until thats done, but other then that I think I'd easily accept the fact Udex is flying.
 Oh well more updates later I guess! Obviously I'd love to stay here as long as I can and train! However it's about time to start our name in America!! (-:

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Pain free!

  Tuesday we finished our osteopath sessions!!!!!! Amazing, right!? Just three sessions and then; boom... An entire new pain free Udex. The last session went beautifully! Udex didn't kick out a once!!! He knows the pain is gone, and he no longer has to expect it to come. His calm, happy attitude shows how he's feeling on the inside; happy. You can just walk up to him and kiss him and cuddle on him!! I still can't believe that my crazy Udex has been turned into a big softy! Really, really, realllly spectacular! I've said it before but I have to say it again.. If your horse is in pain PLEASE get osteopath/homeopath sessions done!! If you can use Utta, then I can promise you that you will have a perfect horse by the time she is done with him!!
  As for saddle news.. Not so good. Blah! This whole not having a saddle thing is literally driving me crazy! No saddle = no ride. Dang. Every day I'm not on his back seems like an entire year. It's been ages! Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating the two months an eency bit... but it sure does feel like for ever. So back to the saddle news! We will buy the grand gilbert in February! Until February I have to find another saddle to use. Obviously that hasn't been going to smoothly. Do we buy a new saddle for 1,000 euro that won't fit him right? Or do we use a cheaper one that doesn't fit him right? This one or that one, that one or this one? Aaaah!! It's seriously been an extremely stressful process!!!! Maybe tomorrow I will have a new saddle, or maybe not. Fingers crossed for one tomorrow. At this point I don't even care what it looks like!! After all it only has to last me until February!!

  I had a fun day the other day playing with Udex on the street and lunging him!! Thats what all the pictures in this post are from!




STARTING NEXT WEEK: I will be taking weekly measurements of Udexs' size and posting them here!! I'm so excited to start this! Thanks for the wonderful tip Utta!!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

The new Udex.

  I have been enjoying my horse more then ever. This is the new him, (well the real him anyways.) This is Udex without the pain. He is a normal, kind horse. Not so much of a beast anymore. I was able to walk a far distance away from the barn, and he didn't winny a once or freak out. He lets me cuddle with him and love on him. It's amazing having such a kind animal. I'm so proud to say he is mine. Although I can't ride him at the moment, I still love him more then ever.
  Speaking of riding, the saddle man comes tuesday! He will size both Udex and I and come up with the perfect saddle! I'm so excited!! I can't wait to start Udex again!!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

The prognosis;

    So we had our first homeopathy session yesterday, sponsored by my lovely trainer. If you are not too familiar with "homeopathy" it's a natural form of healing. Our homeopathic uses her energy and natural talent, and of course natural medicines stemming from herbs. You may think the whole "energy" thing seems a bit absurd and like it wouldn't work.. However I saw with my own two eyes this energetic magic work. I'm jumping ahead of myself though.
  Yesterday we picked my trainer, and Utta (the homeopathic) up and drove to Udex! It was really interesting driving 45 minutes with them and listening. You can really learn so much that way. When we got to the barn I took Udex in and removed his rug. I held him while Utta pressed certain points and ran her fingers around certain spots. She then got to his hip/hock area, and that's where the trouble kicked in (literally.) Udex instantly started a kicking fit with that leg every time she applied pressure to his trouble spot. He had the same reaction on the other side. The trouble wasn't in his spine, hip, or hoof. It really was in the hocks. Yes; hocks. An old injury that never fully went away. How did this injury occur? Piaffe. Lots and lots of it at such a young age, for such a long time and with hyperflexion. It eventually took its toll on his hocks. The good news? Five to ten sessions and it can be cured!! In just our one hour session last night, already there was a huge improvement with his behavior, stride, and legs. Like I said; magic.
  This wasn't the only thing she found however. His jugular veins were clogged. As you know, with rollkur the horse has over 100 kilos of pressure on their over flexed neck. That causes poor circulation and clogged arteries. Udexs' jugular veins never moved when he chewed, and were constantly in an enlarged state. Utta put her finger in his mouth, had him chew, and couldn't feel the veins move; only clumped, hard, and enlarged. She then put her hands a certain way on his head, used her energy to him, and viola; the two veins unclogged. Just like that the problem was solved. It was magic to see them soften, flow, and shrink. The moment she did that Udex became a total different horse! It was amazing! He totally relaxed and was cuddly, kind, and sweet; a new horse.
  He needs more muscle. The solution to that isn't complex. A new custom fit saddle and a special type of saddle pad will do the trick. The saddle pad has padding you can remove and put back in, almost like substitute muscle. When he gains muscle, I can remove one of the inserts, and vice versa, although I hope we will only be gaining, not loosing. Utta said that riding him before caused pain to every part of him. His back, his neck, his face, his hocks, his knees, his hooves; everything and everywhere. She said how lovely he is for being so kind and always giving his best, even though the amount of pain he was in was crazy. As soon as I get the new well-fitting saddle, I can start riding! Thats the best thing I can do for him now; ride.
  I have an entire new respect for homeopathy and transferring and use of energy like Utta did. I don't think just anyone could do it; you really need to have the natural god given talent Utta has. She is a horsewoman, and really respects the horse. She is truly the best. If you have a major problem with you or your horse, then I recommend her in a heart beat. If you can't have her, then have another homeopathic healer heal you or your equine. If anyone asks me if magic is real, now I can reply "yes. I have seen it with my own two eyes."
  Some more good news! Jacq (my trainer) brought a few of her many bits to try out for Udex! We tried them until we found the perfect bit that he enjoyed!!! We also removed the nose band to his bridle! Turns out you don't really have to ride in it! How cool is that!? It makes it easier for me to put the bridle on him, and it fits him better! Eventually I will put a noseband back on, but for now what's the rush?
  Udex should be sore for the next few days. Thats a normal reaction from a homeopathy healing session. I have arnica beads that he will be taking for the next few days. He gets five a day, put right on his gums. They are so little, yet so affective! You would think five little beads as small as a grain of salt couldn't really work, but it does!! Once again, amazing. Today I spent time with him. I gave him the arnica and then walked him for about thirty minutes. The entire time I walked him I just talked to him. I could really feel that he was listening. It was so nice to feel the strong connection right then and there. After walking him I worked with bridling. (you can read how Udex was with the bridle before by clicking here.) Today I put the bridle on successfully without any fighting or problems five times! FIVE! Can you believe it!? Then I spent an hour with him in the paddock, just kissing and hugging him. He left the herd and came over to me. He rested his head on my shoulder and let me kiss and hug him! He is feeling a lot better with his new bit and some of his pain gone. Utta said that the only reason he is like he was before is from the pain. She said as soon as the pain is gone, Udex will be kind and loving. She said he has a heart of gold, and will be an amazing teacher to me. I already agree with her, he has taught me so much already, and even more to come. He's amazing. I love him so much, and I can't wait for the Udex I spent time with today to become permanent him. He means so much to me. His personality is so special. Udex is the best horse in my books. Not for his movement, not for his training, and not for his looks.. But for his personality. That's the part that of him that I'm in love with.

  Next Wednesday at 9:00 am we have our next homeopathic healing session!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Homeopathy session tomorrow!

  Aaaaaah! I'm so nervous!!!! Tomorrow Udex gets his first homeopathy session done!!! I know I shouldn't be nervous.. but at the same time I am!! There are so many things to think about!! What if the woman finds something really wrong? What if Udex goes crazy and he or someone else gets hurt? What if there isn't a problem? What if, what if, what if!? So many "what ifs..." too many. In his past he has already had shiatsu and osteopath sessions... so this may possibly be his first of this kind! Knowing his pampered past though, it isn't. I'm hoping he will have one of those days where he totally surprises me and behaves like a little prince!!! I may have just jinxed myself though.!
  So now for some other news! We are trying different bits tomorrow! My lovely trainer was so kind and offered to bring out bits after bits until we find the one that really fits him. I'm so lucky to have such kind people in my life! Heaven knows bits are costly! So hopefully tomorrow we find the right bit-fit for both of our sake!
  Udex has been happy at home. Acts like he never even left the place! It's awesome!!! Something else that is awesome is the fact Johann takes the horses in at night, so I don't have to take Udes in at night and turn him out in the mornings! Yay!

Enjoying his rutabaga.

  Today Udex was nice. I picked his hooves (which have chunks missing, but normal for this season, eh?) and gave him his rutabaga and rugged him! It's gotten so chilly!! He was running around today just trying to stay warm! Bless him! Also something really funny happened! Whenever I turn Udex out after I'm done with him I usually run beside him. Well today we realllly raced. He pinned his ears back and then gave me the evil look! It was the funniest thing that ever happened!!! Actually turned his head towards me, pinned his ears back, and well; just looked evil!!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Bridle Sour.

  Have you ever heard of a bridle sour horse? Have you ever seen one? Well I sure have.. and let me tell ya, it isn't fun!!! I admit, a lot of Udex being bridle sour is my fault. When I first got him he wasn't as reluctant to put it on as he is now. Let me describe a typical tacking up session with Udex.
  I always have him tied up. For grooming, he is usually quiet and calm. He does get a little fresh occasionally and will pace around a bit. When he sees the saddle he remains quiet and lets me put it on him without any issues, maybe a few side steps sometimes, but most times as I said before, he's quiet. I unclip his lead rope from his halter and put the reins over his neck, then re-clip the lead rope to his halter. At this point he starts to try to dart to the left or right to avoid this. Then I take the halter and slide it onto his neck. Sometimes he runs away and either A) pulls hard at his neck and halter, B) breaks a lead rope, C) ducks his head at an angle the halter slips off his neck and he runs away, or D) paces side to side and begins to start a struggle. When it comes time to put the bit in his mouth, he gets awfully clever. He raises his head so he becomes a giraffe, making my hand slip off of his face with the bridle. He keeps his head raised until I manage to grab him at the right angle and try it again. I repeat the process and try to open his mouth up (he clamps it shut) and he goes up as a giraffe again and pulls back and runs side to side. Usually at this point he has either accomplished option A, B, or C, and is flinging me around, causing a lot of stress on both of us. There is no other way to put the bridle on him but to take him to the arena and let him run, and try it again. Fifty percent of the time I have luck after he is done running, and the other fifty I don't, causing me to run him more and test my luck again. I know letting him run doesn't help this matter in any way, but some days it is my only hope.
 While riding he is fine with the bit/bridle and doesn't seem to be in any apparent pain from it. My trainer has said he is afraid of my hands and needs a duller bit though. The one I'm using now may be a bit (no pun intended) too sharp for him. Of course his rollkur past doesn't help this any matter.
  Taking the bridle off isn't any better. I think this plays a big deal as to why he is so bridle sour. When I have to take it off he gets extremely nervous and goes up, up, up with his head the exact moment I'm sliding the bit out of his mouth. That causes me to yank hard on the bit while pulling it out, creating a terrible situation for poor Udex. Udexs' head is seven feet in the air, I'm on the grounding pulling at the bit while he is way up high, creating a lot of pressure from the bit on his gums. Maybe you can picture what I mean. Not. Pretty. I have tried getting him to drop the poll, but even when he does that he still yanks his head (and the bridle!) up at that exact moment!!!
  I know that what I'm doing doesn't make my situation any better. The bit may be too sharp, I'm not the most steady handed rider, and I totally fail at putting the bridle on and off. What other options do I have though? I'm not about to hire someone to tack Udex up because of this!! The problem is he only trusts me to handle him, with anyone else he inverts and totally looses it even more due to his trust issues. I'm really giving him my best and all. It's so hard to not become stressed with him when he acts like this though. I know it's not his fault, if anyones to blame it's his rollkur trainers and me!!
 As for a solution? I am not sure. I think I may try several things. First I think I will remove my bit from my bridle and just work on putting the bridle on without the bit. Hopefully he will start to realize the bridle isn't a bad thing, and even if he does pull up when I take it off, he won't pull on his mouth and get bit sores. The problem with this solution is I don't think it's the bridle he fears, more so just the bit and the damage the bit has on him. Once he is all right with the bridle without bit, (maybe this takes a long time, maybe just a few sessions) then I will work on putting the bridle on for a very short time, then taking it off while he is eating grain or something so he keeps his head down. After we get to the point he takes the bit like that, I will think of what to do next.
  Sunday the osteopathic comes and will hopefully fix some of the damage. His problem could also be pain in his poll from so many rollkur years. It's extremely likely that his vertebras are fused together in some places; the pole being one of them. If we can find a way to unfuse that, or lessen the pain perhaps that could remove some damage.
   GUESS WHAT!?! Udex behaves like a normal horse alone now!!!! Crazy right!? He used to freak out when he was alone, and now??? What happened to him!? He's a totally new horse! It's crazy!!! I brought him into his stall the other day and he calmly ate his rutabaga, grain, and hay. Didn't winny a once. The old Udex would run, pace, ignore his grain and hay, and keep on winnying until he went back out or one of his specific friends came in. Today I had him tied up alone and he was very calm and relaxed as well!! While in the arena with no other horses in the barn, he didn't winny!! I love it, and hope he decides to make this little change permanent!!! I remember I thought he would never get out of his crazy alone behavior, but today I stand corrected. He has once again proved me and many others wrong!!! I know he will overcome this hard time with the bridle too, and that in good time I will be looking back on this bridle adventure as something silly.  As for now, I have just got to keep trying and lots of positive reinforcement and look on the bright side! As they do say, after the storm comes sunshine!!!!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Home.

   Udex and I are back home, at The Klippenstein. I couldn't be more proud to say so. I shall save the last barn the humiliation, so I will just be leaving it at this, and making a long story short: If you feel safe leaving your horse in an environment with mould everywhere, even in the hay, undersized paddocks over crowded with horses, attacking each other for water and food, jealous girls, a so called "farmer" who can't tell the difference between a rutabaga and kohlrabi and forgets he is handling horses NOT cows.. Then sure, that stable is okay. Let me shorten the story...
 Because I wrote about saving a horses life, two of the barn witches decided to dramatize my story and go tattle tell to the barn owner. Of course everything they said was a lie and when the owner of the horse I saved read through it she could find nothing but the truth. That was the start of my trouble. A few days later I was physically and verbally assaulted and attacked by the grumpy old grandpa-of-a-barn owner. Unfortunately for him his farmer skills get a F-. He couldn't tell the difference between a rutabaga (which is completely healthy for horses to eat!!) and a kohlrabi (which aren't healthy for them.!) He stole my rutabaga from Udexs' food tray, and then had the nerve to say something along these lines to me
   "YOU! (while physically attacking me.) YOU!!!! YOU!!!! You give your horse this kohlrabi!! You want to kill him so you can say that this stable killed your horse!! I called the vet and he said kohlrabis are bad for horses! YOU!!!"
  Whoa now, chill out grandpa! I could have told you kohlrabis are bad for horses. I also found it funny that while a horse was choking to death at their stable, they couldn't call the vet, but he can find time to call the vet about a so called "kohlrabi" I'm giving my horse? Hmmm.. Speaking of calling the vet, maybe he should ring him up and ask about the effects of mouldy hay for horses? I love the entire idea of this "you murder your horse so we can take the credit" thing.... Hahah!! Grandpa made a fool of himself though going around the barn showing over 40 boarders the "kohlrabi" I was giving my horse. I guess he got his karma really fast!!
  I would never give something unsafe to my horse. If I was and someone told me it could kill my horse, I would listen to them until I had proof it was safe for them. When I'm 100 percent sure something is healthy for my horse, and I've already asked a vet about it, and someone comes and physically attacks me and yells at me for it, that's a different story. It's my horse, I'm allowed to feed him whatever I please. Also, Udex is Mr. I-eat-nothing, so the fact he goes nuts over rutabagas should be enough proof he won't kick the bucket from them.
  We left the barn that day.
  Oh how it feels nice to be back home. Friendly faces, lovely people, sweet horses.. Udex acted as if he was never gone. The best part was when Johann, the owner of the barn looked at us with a smile and said "I saved your stall! I knew you'd be back!! It was only a matter of time!!" There are a lot of bad people out there, but good people like Johann and the others at my barn really make up for that.

NOTE: I have pictures of Udex back at home that I've uploaded here!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

RUTABAGAS!!!

Rutabaga.
SOURCE:
http://shizuokagourmet.wordpress.com/

  I have really important advice for horse owners, lovers, leasers.. anyone really..! Give your horse rutabagas!!!!!! Seriously; I said rutabagas. My extremely picky eater goes wild over them!! If Udex eats them, I think its safe to say anyone else horse will too! Here in Germany we have the big one pound things! They are super cheap, just 99 cents per pound! Today we picked up about six HUGE rutabagas for only around five bucks.
 Just rinse theme, and plop them in your horses food dish or on the ground. Your equine will take little bites and roll it around with his nose a bit! It's almost like a game for them!!! I can not express how much the horses love them!!
 So if you haven't already experienced the joy of feeding your horse a rutabaga, then it's about time you head out to the store and buy one for your horse!!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

STALLS!

  As I last wrote about, I'm not to ride Udex until the osteopath woman comes and has a look at him. It's been equally hard on us both. Udex is being hot, hot, HOT (they were moved to a really small paddock and are in stalls now, so that adds to the heat. More on that in a second..) and he has all the go in the world! Also for me, stress is building up. I'm always all for him though, and I know that riding him wouldn't do any good. at all. Today after I let him play in the arena a bit, I had a friend hold him and had a seat on him for just a few seconds. My friend, mom and I were giggling. As soon as I got on his back he instantly perked up and wanted to go!! He was looking like "why aren't we going!? Come on Mama, it's been so long since we have rode!!" It was really cute!! I only did spend maybe four minutes on his back today, but it was nice to feel that skinny thing underneath me again!! Even though it hasn't even been a week, it feels like years!!!

  The weather has gotten chilly!! I heard it is supposed to drop below freezing tonight- yikes! With weather like that all the barn buddies are coming inside at night! Woo-hoo!! Tonight will be their third night in!!! I love when Udex comes in at night. I get him away from all the others without his nerves acting up. It's nice. He gets cuddly, calm, and easier to work with when he is in his box. Of course, in the day they are out in their new smaller paddock now!! Not really much of a paddock, just concrete with some straw and hay outside, with a bit of grassy area. It's really nice though that they can be outside socializing like that though! Since now they are inside, they get silo and grain!! He gets his norm; half a kilo of power feed. Silo now.. I have no idea what it is, or even translates to in english. It is cow hay. Sour, fermented cow hay. It keeps weight on the horses, gives them lots of energy, fiber, and well surprisingly, they like the stuff. Only downside to it is to pay extra attention for the mould! I thought no way will my picky eater like this stuff! It smells rotten and is so moist! Well, I was wrong. He likes it! Not his favorite food, but sure not his worse either!! I watched him carefully eat a bite of silo, and a bite of normal hay, bite of silo, normal hay, silo, normal hay. It was rather cute in a strange kind of way.

  Also a quick funny story. Yesterday I was hand walking Udex around trying to walk out some of his energy since the arena was full. I kept his rug on him, no point in taking it off. Anyways while walking alongside the barn he accidentally brushed his butt up against the wall. I guess it made an extremely terrifying sound, because next thing you know Udex is a spanish horse doing a high flying levade through the air, lifting me up with him!! In a few seconds I calmed him down. His eyes were huge, and he kept staring at that wall like it was going to grow arms and a mouth and eat him any second! So cute seeing my big boy get scared at something sooo silly!!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Used and Abused.

  That's how I think of Udex. He was used, used, used some more, and the whole time abused. To be honest, I don't care who's using hyperflexion on a horse. Wether it be a beginner thinking that's the right way to round a horse, or a top grand prix rider of the sport; abuse is abuse. The ill effects rollkur has had on my horse are unbelievable. Times like yesterday I think is it even fair to let him live on? All this pain he has.. Is it right to try to recover him, or would he be better off free from this painful, challenging world... Then I think that that's only letting the terrible rollkur riders win. That's letting them destroy him. Udex has the drive to fight to be a normal horse again; you can see the fire in his eyes now. I know that he was saved so I could expose the truth about hyperflexion. As you know, he was a horse that was started with it from day one, all the way until it became too much. Not just for minutes at a time, but tens of minutes, possibly even hours. If there was damage to be done by rollkur, you can see it with Udex. He is living proof that rollkur does damage, and not any good.... at all.
 The other day my Dutch trainer came out to have a look. She being such an experienced horsewoman brought to light a lot of problems I was refusing to see the full extent of. Example; the excessive yawning. If you don't know (I didn't up until yesterday) horses usually only yawn once, twice, or maybe even three times if they are tired.. Anything over three times and you should be concerned. There could be a skeletal problem, stress, anxiety, dental problems.. The list goes on. In Udexs' case it is due to a probable skeletal problem and stress due to the pain. As I have said numerous times in my previous posts, Udex has a very bad back due to none other then the "wonderful" hyperflexion. His lumbar spine is locked in place, which causes him to trot in two pieces, much like a rocking horse. Beyond that, it also causes his vertebrae's and ligaments to rub wrong and cause even more pain. Some of his vertebraes' may even be fused together. You could say he has spavin and osteoarthritis in these places. When a horse is ridden so long behind the verticle, eventually those vertebraes do start to form a bone like growth; fusing them together. Also, his nuchal ligaments are very sore and may have damage as well.
 Tying Udex up. Thats another story. Whenever he is tied up he starts to think of what happens next. Horses remember the bad things that happen to them. Unfortunately for Udex he knows that when he was tied up, he was forced to work in a very, very uncomfortable position and worked extremely hard to show off his flashy movements. Every time he is tied, even if I only want to feed him or groom him he starts to pace and go wild. That has been one of the hardest things to work with him at. Having a 17.2 hand horse pacing side to side pulling and breaking lead ropes isn't exactly the easiest thing to work with. When he sees the saddle he starts to become even more tense, stressed, and fearful. He registers the saddle with his back pain. He knows saddle = a lot of pain. The bridle isn't any better. He knows the bit is a sharp, painful tool that will yank him behind the verticle, causing him pain as well.
  My trainer had the perfect description of Udexs' head throwing. When he is behind the bit he is thinking "Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh..." then he throws it and while doing so thinks "HELP ME!" You can imagine how that goes..."Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh... HELP ME.! Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh... HELP ME.!" I did get a chuckle in while watching her reenact that.
 I am not going to ride Udex until the osteopathic comes out and takes a look at him and works on making his pain go away. She will be coming within two weeks! I'm a little nervous about all this. I hope she will be able to find a way to make his pain go away!! I don't want him to life life with pain in every step. Oh well! Positive out looks! For now looks like I will just be working on ground work, respect, and cuddling with Udex!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

There's only three things...

 There is only three [discovered] things that seem to scare Udex. They are.

1. Flying balls
2. Clear bags and bottles
3. Tractors

 I find it normal flying balls scare him. I'm a human and scared of them, I can only imagine how a horse must feel about them. No arms to throw in front of their faces! Clear bags and bottles? Well thats a little interesting, but I can understand that too. Stuff that you can see inside something, the way the light reflects.. Understandable. Tractors... Seriously, little green tractors!?! No, I can not find any logical reason as to why tractors scare him. You can start a motorcycle off right in front of his face, you can halt him right by a car and talk to the driver... but tractors a good 50 feet away from him? Now thats a total different story. Udex confuses me greatly.
  I was looking for a spot to tie him up today and about 45 feet away there was a tractor. Of course, it wasn't really a tractor. It was actually a huge horse hungry monster that was headed STRAIGHT towards Udex!! In "how to be a horse school," when something that scary is on the run towards you, you are supposed to take off, totally trampling over your owner who is leading you. Thats exactly what Udex did. All I can say is OWIE!! That hurt! I do feel a bit accomplished that I didn't let 750 kilos of wild, spookish beast get out of my grip. I held on tight to him even as his crow hopping lifted me in the air as well. I didn't know if I should be more mad at the tractors, or my horse, or myself!! Lately Udex has been frustrating me on all ends. If it isn't this, it's that. If it isn't that, then it's this. He's been a nut ball lately! At least today I managed to put his bridle on outside, and not having him in the arena or stall. That was really nerve wrecking for me because I knew that if he managed to run away.. he would be gone. There is no fences in that part of the barn, he could have gone straight down the hill and far, far away. I get nervous just thinking about that!!! I hope he starts to be a bit more submissive during tack up time!!!
  I rode Udex today. No head throwing at all!!! I think thats because he isn't bored. He has so much to do here now. Thats really awesome he has been feeling so great to the point he's almost too hot to handle!! (-: He needs this!!!!

"Rollkur opponents care for horses. Rollkur proponents care more for success."

Wow, today was amazing.

  I am more then pleased with my lesson today!! Udex was an entire different horse!!!! I can't believe how great he was!! Everything was just so, so, so good today. I still can't stop smiling and feeling happy all over!!!
  Today was a very windy day. Most the horses I know get a little on edge when its this windy out! Of course, Udex was a brave boy and totally content in the wind. I actually think he really enjoys it actually! He loves to stand facing the wind and makes nice happy snorting sounds. It's really cute to see him so happy. Anyways, having him tied up outside and grooming him, he was lovely. He had a huge amount of energy which was a sign to me that we were going to have a very good ride. After grooming came tacking up! Like usual, as soon as the saddle and leg wraps were on, he become super fresh. He gets really, really, realllly excited. He enjoys working; especially riding! Putting the bridle on was a hassle. He just wanted to run around! He is a well over seventeen hand horse.. When he decides to put his head in the air while the bit is mid-way in his mouth and his rider is only 5''1...  you do face a bit of trouble. After the bridle was on, I mounted him and we rode to the arena!
  Like I had suspected, he was very hot and fresh today. His walk was really fast and energetic (which I didn't mind!!) and you could feel the pressure to start trot! Of course he did his little trot bolts here and there in the beginning, but after fifteen minutes in walk he cooled down a bit and got his head in the game. That's the thing with Udex. Once his head is in game mode, he doesn't leave it. He gets really focused on what he needs to do and doesn't let anything distract him. Occasionally he does give a whinny or two to his pals, but he continues on like nothing happened. That said, today once he was mentally with me, he was preforming beautifully! One movement, where you leg yield diagonally from the corner to X, ride one horse lengths straight, and then start to leg yield back to the next corner on the side. I only know the word for this in german, not in english. I don't even know if this has a name in english? Udex does these really good though. It's amazing how easy he makes it look, and does it. We have also been doing lots of shoulder and haunches in, renverse and traverse. He does those really, really good and easy. It's almost funny because with him you can ride them more easy then you can a circle.
  Siting trot!!! That has been coming along unbelievably well!! I am really, really pleased with my seat. It looks really good, especially considering that he was declared as an "impossible" horse to sit!! When I am sitting him in trot it's anything but easy, and is still really, really, really difficult to do. I have been practicing like crazy though and every time it's getting better!! I am happy with the seat I have right now, and I wont mind if it stays like this with him. I do hope (and know!) that in a little time, it will get more natural to sit him like this and I won't have to do as much as I am now for this pretty seat.
  Cantering was fantastic!! He does his walk to canter transitions wonderfully. No steps of walk or trot between, just pure canter. It's fantastic with him!!! He does it so gracefully and with so much ease. It's really fantastic to sit his canter too. Everyone else that rides him disagrees, but with me I find it rather refreshing. When you have to sit such a difficult trot all the time, switching to something as steady as canter is just a better feeling.
  On top of our great day, Udex is also gaining a lot of weight!! His ribs are barely visible!! I think that by december he will look the exact way he should! Aaaah! I'm too happy!!!! To see his withers getting definition, his hips getting rounder, and his ribs slowly fading under fat and muscle... Wow! It is a feeling like no other! Looking at him today I said to my friends "see that muscle right there? Yup! Six months ago; it didn't even exist." I pointed out a million newfound muscles as I said that. He has seriously come so far. I couldn't be more pleased!!! Ahh! I am stoked!! There are so many moments I look at him and have to convince myself that yes, this is the scrawny, thin, malnourished, depressed horse I took him six months ago!! This is one amazing journey I am so thankful to be taking. All the time while making Udex feel better, and me a better rider... I get to share the word about how rollkur does more harm then good!! This has been amazing! Killing three birds with one stone! W-O-W! Talk about cool!?

Everything I do I have to do 50% more of.

 As always, I had my Friday lesson with Udex. It was alright. I feel like we are kind of stuck right now. It frustrates me a little bit because everything that I do with him, I have to do 50% more then any one else must do with their horse. Take sitting trot for example. I have to use every muscle, plus so much more. So while I'm doing a leg yield at trot not only I'm doing a leg yield and using my leg/thigh muscles... I'm also using so much more muscles to stay in the saddle. [Thank you rollkur for making my horse a "rocking horse" aka impossible to sit without huge effort.] Also when I'm trotting it takes amazing effort to keep the reins steady, since he does tend to throw his head, and he is a rocking horse. So for a leg yield in trot add that to the list too. Fighting to keep the reins steady. Then you also have the head throwing, the getting him to not curl behind the bit, and other things. Honestly I am fine that I have to do all that extra work. In the long run it's making me a better rider and giving me the experience and skills most riders will never get the chance to find and develop. Six months ago when I first got Udex I thought I would never be able to sit him in rising trot. He had too much movement in his back, plus a hard to sit stride. No one else could sit him. I watched so many great rider friends of mine get off and say "yeahh.. this has to be the most terrible horse to sit I have ever sat on." I would sigh and loose hope. Well six months later I can do rising trot with steady hands and staying balanced and have him on the bit, not behind. I can also do this in sitting trot and canter and walk. My point is, even though at the time things see impossible with Udex... We get over it.
  Something I have found interesting is my trainers expectations of us. Six months ago she would praise me for doing three steps of sitting trot without falling off. Now she scolds me when I do less then a round of sitting trot without steady hands. She demands more. She wants my aids even more invisible then they already are. I find it fascinating though!! It has only been six months and we are schooling L and M movements. Pretty soon we will start the double bridle!!
  Right now I am feeling like some things with Udex are impossible. I feel like we are stuck. I know that this too we will overcome stronger then ever. It just gets tricky sometimes with Udex. Stressful is a good word for it. I mean sometimes I would just like to have a nice problem free horse that I didn't have to work so much with... but then I remember how Udex was born a nice problem free horse.. Rollkur made him into the horse he is today. Sometimes I just want to scream and cry because I'm sooo angry some idiot had to ruin such a wonderful heart with hyperflexion. Ah.! Then I think about how doing that would do no good at all. Instead I just sigh, give Udex a hug and pat, and think that this all had to happen for a reason. Udex is my horse now... which means I am getting the word out that rollkur is not a good thing. I'm going to open peoples eyes about the truth to this horrid "training" tool. The only thing rollkur does is destroy. Please remember that. I have to do Udex, and all the other horses trained with rollkur justice. This needs to be stopped. I can't stand to see another horse sustain the same problems that Udex has. It isn't fair for the horses. Please share Udexs' story and get the word out that rollkur is harmful!!!